People are telling me “I’m not happy where I am, with my struggling love-life, my boring job, my stressful bosses, my lack of fitness, my poor finances, my dim social life, my aches and pains, my….?” I hear them say “I’m tired, I’m lonely, I’m depressed, I’m poor, I’m overweight, I’m stuck here, I can’t find a good partner, I’m stressed, I’m too old or it’s too hard!”
What did I say?
Ask yourself this question What did I say?
Stop and listen to those words above, they’re pessimistic, defeatist and gloomy and they’re feeding your mindset. Change your mindset and you’ll have more joy in life, it will become easier. But how? One technique to facilitate change is to adjust how you say what you say.
The words you speak and think are powerful because they are food for your sub-conscious and your sub-conscious drives your behaviours. By choosing different words and ways to express yourself you can start to change what you feed your sub-conscious….and it makes a difference to how you behave, feel and engage in life.
Starting small for a taster. If someone asks how you are, don’t say “not bad” or “ok”, perhaps try saying “Fabulous”, or “Wonderful” or “Splendid”. For extra effect say it deliberately, with upbeat energy and with a smile. (Yes, it’s ok to fake it till you make it). Try it at work and at the checkout and notice the responses.
Intentionally modify your word diet with positive and affirmative language and you’ll change your life – Adjust what goes in (thoughts) and what goes out (dialogue) and the results can be surprising. Consciously rearrange the context of your language to provide yourself with Mindset Nourishment.
Focus on your self-talk by asking What did I say? and then ramp it up as you focus on how you speak to others.
Too often people talk in the negative, saying words which continue to reinforce more of what they don’t want. Rephrase your speech into the positive which might look like going from “I’m always stressed at work, it’s hard to keep on top of it” to be replaced by “I enjoy my job and I work efficiently and effectively”. Repeat this (or words for your circumstance) often to yourself in your mind and audibly (think car or shower solos) and the subtle changes creep in.
My tip for you is to ACE it.
This simple 3 step process can assist you adjust how you say what you say:
Step 1 Awareness – Become Aware of what you say, listen to yourself, Acknowledge and Adjust. It’s a game, catch yourself out and say it differently
Step 2 Create – Choose positive ways to speak, be Creative with healthy dialogue and Confidence
Step 3 Express – Be Enthusiastic with your word Expression, your smile, your tone and how you Engage with others
This isn’t an occasional thing, it’s a Repeat and Repeat again activity.
And if you forget, then ACE it again. Make it a habit, a way of life so to speak and when you ask yourself What did I say? you can be Aware, Create positive words and conversations, and Express yourself with enthusiasm.
And remember…… you’re awesome!